The Half-Assed Wizard: Books 1-4
(2018)(A book in the Half-Assed Wizard series)
An omnibus of novels by Gary Jonas
Four books about a slacker wizard in one place.
He must have been too lazy to separate them.
The Complete Half-Assed Wizard Series
Includes:
The Half-Assed Wizard (Book 1)
A couple of jerks wake me up at the crack of noon. Seems my klepto uncle stole an ancient deck of Tarot cards from a high-powered wizard, and too many losers want to ruin my day to get them back.
The cards are cool, so I check them out, but my magic-happy cousin, Sabrina, tells me I'm not supposed to touch them. Oops. Too late. Now the damn cards are tuned to me, and if someone else wants to use them, I have to die. Why couldn't she have led with that information?
Magic was never my scene, but my dad is one of the most powerful wizards in the world, so I've got unrealized potential if I ever bother to apply myself. I'd rather power nap, but with wizards, gunslingers, and cannibalistic shark dudes coming at me, that's not gonna happen.
They say I'm a half-assed wizard, but if I don't play my cards right, I'm gonna get my whole ass killed.
The Big-Ass Witch (Book 2)
Life sucks. My old man makes me work for a big-ass witch named Lakesha so I can learn magic and help people. My first gig turns out to be an abduction, which sounds like a job for law enforcement, not a half-assed wizard like yours truly. Just my luck though – it’s a ghost that’s been snatched, which is right in my wheelhouse.
Why would anyone want to kidnap a ghost? And why should I care one way or the other? I prefer power napping to kidnapping.
But when the abductors use the ghost to kill a man in a robbery gone wrong, it's up to me to save the day. As long as I don't have to get up before noon...
The Dumbass Demon (Book 3)
My old man sics a nuisance demon named Kevin on me to force me to grow up and stop being a slacker. The only way I can expel the jerk is to develop magic I create and control. Until then, Kevin plans to push me, prod me, and annoy me into action.
It's one thing to miss a few naps, but Kevin shoves me into a dispute between a Greek god who wants to be a rock star and some hot women I thought were just myths, but make wonderful music together. Now I have to learn magic or the only nap I'll be taking is a dirt nap.
The Lame-Assed Doppelganger (Book 4)
What do you do when you've been replaced?
I come home from a vacation to find that another version of me has taken my place. He's living my life. He has my friends. He has my career. And what really sucks is that he's doing it all so much better than I ever could. Everyone loves him!
I'm the real me, but he insists that he's the real me. Not cool. One of us has to go!
Oh, and one more pesky little problem. Someone's trying to kill me.
Why are you reading this line? Click buy already. You know you need a good laugh.
Genre: Fantasy
He must have been too lazy to separate them.
The Complete Half-Assed Wizard Series
Includes:
The Half-Assed Wizard (Book 1)
A couple of jerks wake me up at the crack of noon. Seems my klepto uncle stole an ancient deck of Tarot cards from a high-powered wizard, and too many losers want to ruin my day to get them back.
The cards are cool, so I check them out, but my magic-happy cousin, Sabrina, tells me I'm not supposed to touch them. Oops. Too late. Now the damn cards are tuned to me, and if someone else wants to use them, I have to die. Why couldn't she have led with that information?
Magic was never my scene, but my dad is one of the most powerful wizards in the world, so I've got unrealized potential if I ever bother to apply myself. I'd rather power nap, but with wizards, gunslingers, and cannibalistic shark dudes coming at me, that's not gonna happen.
They say I'm a half-assed wizard, but if I don't play my cards right, I'm gonna get my whole ass killed.
The Big-Ass Witch (Book 2)
Life sucks. My old man makes me work for a big-ass witch named Lakesha so I can learn magic and help people. My first gig turns out to be an abduction, which sounds like a job for law enforcement, not a half-assed wizard like yours truly. Just my luck though – it’s a ghost that’s been snatched, which is right in my wheelhouse.
Why would anyone want to kidnap a ghost? And why should I care one way or the other? I prefer power napping to kidnapping.
But when the abductors use the ghost to kill a man in a robbery gone wrong, it's up to me to save the day. As long as I don't have to get up before noon...
The Dumbass Demon (Book 3)
My old man sics a nuisance demon named Kevin on me to force me to grow up and stop being a slacker. The only way I can expel the jerk is to develop magic I create and control. Until then, Kevin plans to push me, prod me, and annoy me into action.
It's one thing to miss a few naps, but Kevin shoves me into a dispute between a Greek god who wants to be a rock star and some hot women I thought were just myths, but make wonderful music together. Now I have to learn magic or the only nap I'll be taking is a dirt nap.
The Lame-Assed Doppelganger (Book 4)
What do you do when you've been replaced?
I come home from a vacation to find that another version of me has taken my place. He's living my life. He has my friends. He has my career. And what really sucks is that he's doing it all so much better than I ever could. Everyone loves him!
I'm the real me, but he insists that he's the real me. Not cool. One of us has to go!
Oh, and one more pesky little problem. Someone's trying to kill me.
Why are you reading this line? Click buy already. You know you need a good laugh.
Genre: Fantasy
Used availability for Gary Jonas's The Half-Assed Wizard: Books 1-4