Shirley Jump

Shirley Jump didn't have the willpower to diet nor the talent to master under-eye concealer, so she bowed out of a career in television and opted instead for a career where she could be paid to eat at her desk--writing.

After she got married and had kids, humor became the only thing that got her through the mashed potato fling-fests and toilet paper decorating sprees. She turned to the world of romance novels where messes are (usually) cleaned up before The End and no one is calling anyone a doodoo-head. In the worlds Shirley gets to create and control, the children listen to their parents, the husbands always remember holidays and the housework is magically done by elves.

Though she's thrilled to see her books in stores around the world, Shirley mostly writes because it gives her an excuse to avoid cleaning the toilets and helps feed her shoe habit.